Steadfast

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North Ridge entered 2012 by partnering with Port City Church in an initiative called My One Word. My One Word is a program where an individual methodically selects a single word, an attribute to which the aspire, to focus on becoming throughout the year. This single word replaces the cumbersome list of New Year’s resolutions that are all broken by Valentine’s Day. My word for 2012 began as ‘bold’ and honed down to ‘speak’ before the year’s end. You may remember seeing drawings from the sermon series (check out the My One Word link in my past series cloud if you are new to Plasso).  Several of us who found success in emulating our words last year chose to re-up on My One Word in 2013. My word for this year – steadfast.

Steadfast – fixed in direction, firm in purpose, unwavering, firmly fixed in place or position.

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.  James 1:12

Our family of five will be embarking on an adventure this year that we will be a ride that lasts the next four. We are letting go of a safe, consistent income so my wife can return to school full-time. She has been teaching biology in public high school since the fall of 2001. The increasing government regulations and bureaucratic meddling is effectively driving all the quality teachers out of the public sector, Julie is adding her name to their casualty list at the end of this semester. This time of spring in 2017, she will graduate as a licensed pharmacist.

To be quite honest, I chose this word focus on for all four years of the PharmD program! Letting go of the teaching position is the least of my concerns, I’m actually relieved to be free from the toll that career path takes on the teacher’s family. I encourage any young person who asks my opinion on their projected career path to avoid teaching if they also see family in their future. The nation’s public school system is in a sad state, driven by statistical algorithms instead of actual effectiveness. The mountains of paperwork and loathsome hours wasted keeping up with the requirements of this bureaucratic mess have changed the landscape of public teaching.  No longer is it a honorable career path that opens the door to significantly impacting children’s lives. It is now a contractual marriage to a thankless job that demands higher priority than any other aspect of the teacher’s life. 12 years of experience as a teacher’s spouse (2/3 of one year testing out the job personally) created my opinion and nearly every person I speak to who are also (or were formerly) married to a teacher corroborate this position. I am at least as equally excited as Julie that her professional divorce from teaching will be finalized in thirty days.

Our objective now is maintaining the household while she becomes a commuter student  and fulfills a dream to enter the medical field which was alive when we met 16 years ago. Remaining steadfast.

Those of you who follow this blog know how my mind works, or at least are familiar with its results. Steadfast is more than just my word until 2017, it is also an image that is burned into my mind and hangs on the wall above the desk where I type.

Steadfast

Steadfast

Steadfast is composed of three 12″ x 16″ canvases. I used four 8-penny nails to hold each panel in place. Once the shape was created, I began painting. The primary emotion I wanted to convey was agitation. The first layer of the painting was a very dark, midnight black with just a touch of blue. To experiment with media (and a bit out of necessity when I realized I was out of blue acrylic at the time), the under-painting of this piece is tempra.

I made sure to purchase all the black and blue I could need for the outer layer of this piece. Using long, fast, borderline violent strokes horizontal strokes, I imagined myself inside a tornado seeing the wind and debris swirling around my head. Various shades of blues and blacks concealed the dull under-painting. Stepping back to look, I was quite pleased (and a little out of breath) when this sitting was complete.

The final piece of this painting was to take a Jackson Pollock sort of spin like I used in ‘Torn‘ and literally throw some highlights of orange, yellow and white onto the dark canvas. Hosting a party to break the mundane-ness of January changed my direction. Once complete, ‘Steadfast’ had a hole to fill over the computer desk in our living room. It is not a direct focal point in our party-gathering space, but leaving the space empty would stick out like a sore thumb. Though incomplete, I hung ‘Steadfast’ for the party. This proved to be a defining choice for the piece and my understanding of my word.

We have can lights in the ceiling in our living room and the wall above our computer desk is an ideal location for artwork without glass because the piece is perfectly illuminated. ‘Steadfast’ was no different. The piece looks amazing in this location; the lighting makes the subtle light blues pop against the darker hues. The light also added another unexpected dimension. Reflecting against a sheen I only guess was created by painting acrylic over tempra, a streak of almost white yellow slithers its way down the paint and gives the image the same likeness as a calm, moon-lit lake.

Steadfast (no flash)

Steadfast (no flash)

A good friend who is a creating in his own right as a writer (check out his work here) admired the piece and we discussed the background, the creative process, and the future plans for the piece. Jason made a profound suggestion; leave the image as is for 2013, but revisit it each year and modify the image as your understanding of remaining steadfast evolves. Pure creative genius. I am doing as he suggested and practicing steadfastness by leaving the image alone until next January.

What began as an agitated, chaotic whirl-wind with three canvases holding on for dear life became the most peace-filled, calming image I can recall ever creating. Through the process of creating this piece, God showed me that remaining steadfast is not just exemplified in a soldier on the front lines of battle who yells to his comrades to stand their ground. There is a peaceful, calm side of steadfastness as well. Keeping your cool under stress, refusing the urge to worry when anxiety comes knocking, declining the part-time, third shift job I was offered to supplement the income and remaining faithful that ends will meet without sacrificing my presence with Julie and the boys. This is me remaining steadfast.

Steadfastness for you could manifest in a thousand different ways. Steadfastness is maintaining your integrity and standing your ground. While at times it will be a fight against adversity, there is a peacefulness to be found. Peace as a result and peace within.

Peace runs deep, deep in Him.  - ‘Train Song’ Josh Garrels

O Ye of Little Faith

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O Ye of Little Faith

He’s got the whole world, in His hands

He’s got the whole wide world, in His hands

He’s got the whole world, in His hands

He’s got the whole world in His hands.

For those of us who spent our early years in the children’s programming of a local church, these lyrics are ingrained into our minds (including hand motions). It’s got a catchy tune that children can sing along with, then a parent got smart and made up some motions to burn some energy out of their sugared-up Bible school class! Genius. This song did not originate in Sunday school, however. It was first published as a traditional American spiritual in 1927 as part of a paperback hymnal; “Spirituals Triumphant, Old and New“. Today’s progression in Matthew 8 brought the premise of this old Bible school song to mind and inspired an introspective question, do I really believe He does?

Matthew dives right into his first three miracle stories and a lesson in discipleship after finishing his introduction of Jesus’s ministry in chapter 8.  In these passages, Jesus heals a Centurian soldier’s servant, Peter’s (one of his disciples) mother-in-law, “many” who were demon possessed – including two men whose demons he cast into pigs that later stampeded to their deaths in the ocean. Not only those who witnessed these miracles, but even those who heard of them through first hand account immediately recognized and understood Jesus’s authority stretches much further than the spirituality of his followers. Even the Gentile Centurian, for whom inviting Jesus into his home was taboo, believed this, Matthew 8:5-13.

Jesus marveled at his followers saying, “I have not found such great faith anywhere in Israel.” – translation: you fellas know me but this guy who was not raised to expect me (ie. he’s a Gentile that does not understand the Jewish culture’s prophecy of the Messiah) has only heard about what you’ve witnessed and he has more faith than you!

I too can claim first hand witness to events that have no explanation other than divine miracles. Those of you close to me know Julie, the boys and I have made some big decisions in the last year that will lead our family through a time where our faith will need to remain strong. In light of those decisions, I allowed my logic to get in the way of my heart and nearly committed to taking on a second job that would have had a significant impact on my time and my focus at home and elsewhere. After some wise advice and lots more prayer, I abandoned that idea and am trusting God to sustain us in the way He deems best.

What did I take away from Dean’s sermon today?

Jesus is sovereign over all. Not just what I think he can handle; all.

 Faith in Jesus’s sovereign authority manifests itself in humble trust.

I was last left with a question:

“What are you afraid of, o ye of little faith?” Matthew 8:26

He’s got the whole world, in His hands.

He’s got the whole world in His hands.

From Discipline to Delight, Prayer and Fasting

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From Discipline to Delight, Prayer and Fasting

From discipline to delight in prayer and fasting, Matthew 6:5-18.

Today I’m sharing my first spontaneous drawing completed using my tablet. I drew this using Autodesk Sketchbook and Photoshop.

I invite you to absorb today’s verses and then allow the art to speak to you as it chooses.

God wants you affection, not your duty. One’s proximity to God is not measured by visible devotion but by their proximity to their neighbor’s need.

Discouragement

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Haters, naysayers, pessimists, and doomsday prophets are all driven by the same attribute, vision. Be it their own or extinguishing another’s, these are the people who will either make or break you.

Our enemy will discourage you from without

and discourage you from within.

Conquer your oppressor through prayer, recalling the source of your vision and revising your plan of attack.

Keep your focus.

Prayer

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Wrapping up our series ‘How To Pray’, today’s image sums up all we’ve learned in the last two weeks. The image for the day will speak to each viewer where they are at, so I will limit my interference by keeping this post short.

The yellow on the left is life and all the dirt that comes with it. The words circumstance, worry, and fear are all buried inside this color. ‘Fear’ is positioned so that the ‘r’ hooks the back of the blue figure’s head, attempting to pull it down.

You are the dark blue figure. You and everything else that comes with you. Flowing inside the body are the words doubt (strategically placed), weakness, failure, inadequacy, and surrender.

The light blue on the right represents the Holy Spirit, the one who intercedes for us and communicates through our prayers. When we pray, God offers us grace, forgiveness, strength, vision, and His will.

The key to powerful prayer is total surrender. By surrendering our will, we are free to follow His.

The last thing I want you to notice is the movement in the image. As ‘fear’ pulls the figures head down, the Holy Spirit reaches under its chin, lifting the head back up.

This is prayer.

The Lord’s Prayer

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The model for praying described by Jesus in what is known as the Lord’s Prayer lays out a three-phase process for communicating with the Creator. Let’s break down these directions from Matthew 6:9-13

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.

As we begin to pray, we should first declare God’s greatness.  By first recognizing God’s position we cannot avoid realizing ours as relative to Him. Last week posed the question, what if the point of prayer is not to get God to do stuff? Establishing your’s and God’s places by declaring His immeasurable greatness makes your wish list of requests vanish in a shadow of humility.

I am representing the start of prayer by the outer edge of this digital image. Light yellow with a white lining brings a sense of awe and a feeling of greatness.

Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.

After realizing God’s magnificence, the next natural step is surrendering your will to Him. This is often easier said than done. Who has any natural desire to give up what they want? No one, that is why we pray for the ability to let go. In this stage of prayer we surrender all of ourselves to God. Here lies the most important part of prayer, because it is in surrender that life-change occurs. Nearly every testimony of how God turned someone’s life or situation around will be preceded by “I laid it all down and gave it to God.” Surrender is the door to growth.

To symbolize surrender, the middle circle is a soft blue-grey. This hue of blue inspires relaxation, de-stressing, and letting go.

Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Finally, acknowledge your dependency on God. Now you get back to your wish list, likely much shorter now than when you began to pray. In making your requests, you are inherently acknowledging your dependence on God to fill those requests. Tied with that is acknowledging your own inadequacy to accomplish those desires on your own. After declaring God’s greatness and surrendering your own will, submitting requests to God feels more like asking for petty favors than dispatching a super-natural force of productivity.

The central circle is a deep blue, the darkness representing the shame that often comes with acknowledging our inadequacies and claiming our dependency.

My choice of colors in today’s drawing is significant for each aspect of prayer, but also work together in the overall image. If you’ve taken any art classes that studied color, you will recall dark colors recess and light colors project. The center circle is darkest and the colors grow lighter as they move out, drawing your eye in and pulling your mind through the image. The decreasing size of the circles symbolizes an increased humility as the prayer progresses.

One final word closes the prayer; amen. Amen is a word that dates back to early religious texts of Judaism, Christianity and Islam. The word is a declaration of affirmation that literally means, ‘so be it’ or ‘let it be so’. We close prayers with ‘amen’ as a declaration to let the outcomes of the conversation we just had with the Creator be fulfilled, it is our commitment of surrender to God’s will and promise of action to come. A simple star at the very center of the page is amen.

Go into your room, pray this way in private, praying as long as it takes.